Hey Big Spammos, ᶦᵗ'ˢ ᵐᵉ ᵃᵍᵃᶦⁿ
Wait… what’s up with those tiny letters? Is Már okay? Has he fallen down a well? Or is he far away?
NEITHER! It’s a trap. A tool from a master of text.
You see, I’ve been playing you like a fiddle for years, but… how? Was it by dedicating countless hours on honing my writing skills to tug at your heartstrings through thought-evoking prose? ᶦ ʷᶦˢʰ
Nope, the beautiful thing about technology-bound written communication dominating our existence is that we can supplement our meager writing with form, feel, and f̶a̶l̶s̶e̶ rhythm.
The downside is that any idiot can mimic it.
Everything went downhill after Slack allowed this
Before, only the tech-savvy could mask their vacuous prose through italics and bold by knowing the dark arts of putting _underscores_ or *asterisks* on each side of words, but now most apps offer any simpleton these options in a user-friendly way.
Luckily though, Big Tech hasn’t yet caught onto the next frontier in online writing.
So brace yourselves and receive my ultimate bequeathal: ᵗᶦⁿʸ ᵗᵉˣᵗ ᵍᵉⁿᵉʳᵃᵗᵒʳ
There’s just something deliciously funny about the sudden injection ʳᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵗᶦⁿʸ ᵗᵉˣᵗ that I can’t put my finger on. Is it an internal scream? A cry for help? An insult whispered under your breath?
I also love that since the developer had to clamber together three alphabets that aren’t ‘official’ in Unicode, the superscript can look wildly chaotic some places — making it a tiny mouse-whisper and MOcKing SpoNGEBoB CApiTALizaTION all rolled into one beautiful sensual assault.
So, go forth my children, use my gift and wreak havoc on the world.
ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ᵐᵒᵐᵐᵃ ᵐáʳ ᵖʳᵒᵘᵈ
(P.S. there's a feedback form at the bottom of the email, let us know what you think about Big Spam!)
